Camillus McElhinney (1933-2006)

Eulogy

My dad was a wonderful father, to me and all my brothers and sisters.

My dad was my friend;
 my ally;
  my confidante;
   he is my inspiration;
    my motivation;
     he was my hero;
      he was my champion.

My daddy passed away peacefully in his sleep, on November 27th, 2006. The doctor estimated that his heart had stopped beating about half-an-hour before his eldest, my darling sister Marie, arrived with his morning paper. His youngest, Thomas, and his darling, dear wife Susan, were the first to know. Thomas called for the doctor, who said to my mammy that my had daddy died the way he had lived - a quiet, gentleman.

Marie called on Evelyn, who came to tell me of the news I had dreaded for twenty years, and we then went on to pick up brother William from college. The two brothers consoled each other in the back of the car, while dearest Evelyn drove us back to mum and dad's house.

Granny Ann soon arrived to console my mother. Thomas noticed that Dad must have got up in the middle of the night to make a cup of tea for himself – he'd gone to the back of the cupboard and picked out the mug that said "Dad" on it.

What an honour for my dad that the Last Orders, the cleaning and preparation of his body, was performed by two professional, qualified nurses, his own son Shaun and daughter Evelyn.

Over the next few days, the family gathered from the corners of the earth, from Florida, from Dubai, from Canada, from Ireland. Many tears were shed, but we got strength from each other, and realised that although we would have wanted him to be with us a while longer, his death was in many ways quite beautiful, and that there could have been no other way - if my mammy had died before him, if any of his offspring had died before him, he would not have died a happy man. Little son-son Josh even noticed that Grandad seemed to be smiling. Later in the week, after an incredibly emotional and spiritually up-lifting rosary, the first with all nine children, lead by Father Conroy, Josh even asked Granny – "Is Grandad getting happier?"

My daddy was a wonderful father. He was a wonderful father to us all, both as a family and individually.

I am so happy today to tell you that my daddy's last year in particular was a joyous one.
In July, we had a big family reunion for my Mum's 70th birthday, highlighted by a wonderful evening with almost all the extended family, and friends and neighbours of long years standing. I later told my mum that for those days I was "walking on air". Perhaps someone else is walking on air right now. That celebration was as much for my dad as for his life-partner, my darling mammy, his Susan.

The following week a group of fourteen of us invaded Moville, with the highlight being Gerardine's 40th birthday party. (Heckle from Geri - "39th!"). Son-son Josh told his granny later that it was the most beautiful place he'd ever been!

We visited with Teesie and Seamus, and the grandchildren got to see where their Grandad was born, and dad met up with Anthony and Martha for the last time. His sister Bridie and her son Sean and family, and nieces Theresa and Greta came for Geri's birthday bash, and niece Brigeen popped up to see him with her little baby. The highlight of a wonderful five days was Geri's birthday party, after a lovely meal, the adults retired to Rosata's bar, where Dad was (yet again) the life and soul of the party.

My dad's legacy was indeed a rich one - a thriving family, his six sons and three daughters and his crown jewels, the eleven grandchildren.
By the way he lived his life, my dad showed that he knew that some of the best things in life are free. But others have to be earned.

The Family Business was augmented over the years in a series of Happy Mergers. In Picture Framing and in the business of Putting Roofs over People's Heads; in the Purveyance and Marketing of Quality Goods; in Wedding Planning; all were added to the portfolio of Civil Engineering, Electrical and Electronic Engineering, Software Engineering, Education and Training, Home Economics, Nursing and Caring, Music, Dancing and Choreography.

We believe that Chairman Grandad Camillus McElhinney, Senior may now haved moved to The Higher Authority, to join Chairman Poga Rinji Sherpa, Chairman Tino Tamburi, Chairman Grandpa Michael Smith Senior.

There have been reports that he may be galavanting around the streets of Moville. We can say with certainty that he ain't in no "Big Bingo Hall in the Sky".

I can tell you that the board has some inside information regarding his exact whereabouts now, but we are not in a position to divulge this information at this time.

On the 27th of November, 2006, Chairman Grandad Camillus relinquished control of the Family Business into the safe hands of his sons and daughters and their spouses, the grandchildren's mums and dads and aunts and uncles – under the watchful eyes of his beloved wife, Granny Susan, and Grandma Kay, Granny Ann, Grandad Tommy, Yeye Semran and Gaga Pema.

Camillus McElhinney, Senior was not a "self-made man". Some others had a big affect on making him the man he was. His own mum and dad, and brothers and sisters for example... At his 70th birthday celebration, dad toasted his "rock", the woman who had been with him and supported him through all his joys and sorrows – his darling wife, Susan.

I'd just like at this point to thank you all, all gathered here, and absent friends, for your sincere condolences and notes of sympathy. But if you sympathise with us today, in the true sense of the word, then you'll be happy today. We are not devastated by his death. We celebrate his life here with us, and his new life, re-united with his mother and father, and all the Faithfully Departed, in Heaven. We are not devastated, be consoled - the house that dad built was constructed on solid ground. By his death, we are "stirred, not shaken".

My dad had a simple faith in the Faith of his Fathers. I recall a time maybe fifteen or twenty years ago, in a bar along the road from here in Duntocher, when the younger man was waxing lyrical about metaphysics and evolution, and wondering, with all the "contradictions" in the Bible, how could you believe all that religion stuff. The older man took a draft of his whisky, and with a a slight note of exasperation, he plainly replied – "Because it's the truth, son."

My dad brought us up to question everything, never to just take something on trust because he told us it was so. He taught by example. I remember a time back in 228 just before he retired – it was just me and him left in the dining room, and I noticed that dad had been quietly staring out the window into the garden. I offered a penny for his thoughts. After a short pause, he said "I was just thinking that maybe immortality is in your children and your children's children". I just thought "Wow! Dad!"
Dad was a quite man – but not a silent man. Having a conversation with my dad wasn't like consulting the oracle, he knew the value of listening, of saying nothing when you had nothing useful to say; the value of small-talk, of talking about simple things.

My dad was a gentleman – but with him, it was always two words – nothing to do with fancy manners and airs and graces and etti-quetty – he was a Gentle Man, and he and my mother brought us all up to be gentle men and gentle women.

Some have mentioned that my dad was A "bit of a character". Anyone who had the pleasure of his presence at parties, with his renditions of songs both happy, sad, and plain hilarious, in particular The Little Beggar Man and The Wee Cock Sparra may tend to agree. But there was more to dad than his party side- He was a "bit of a character", but more importantly, my dad was a man of character.

Camillus McElhinney, Senior was an Irish man,
 a Donegal man,
  an Ulster man,
   from Inishowen,
    a simple son of the soil of McElhinney farm at Cooley,
     in the parish of Moville.

Camillus McElhinney, Senior was a working man,
 A family man,
  A gentle man,
   A quiet man,
    A simple man,
     An honest man

In short:

Camillus McElhinney, Senior – Now there was a man!